Mutual Masturbation: Everything You've Ever Wanted To Know


Best Tips for Mutual Masturbation

Jacking off, cranking one out, spanking the monkey, or beating the meat: Whatever you call it, one thing’s for certain. Everybody does it. Masturbation is a great sexual release. It lowers stress levels. It helps you sleep. It might even help prevent prostate cancer. It’s also fun as hell.

You already know that masturbation is an amazing, solo pursuit. Have you ever considered adding it to you and your partner’s sexual routine? If not, you should! Mutual masturbation can enhance your relationship in mind-blowing ways. Your friends from UVee Clean are here to cover everything you need to know about mutual masturbation.

What is Mutual Masturbation?

Mutual masturbation is the practice of masturbating along with a partner who is also doing the same. In other words, you’re doing what you need to get yourself off, and they’re doing the same.

Mutual masturbation is something that can happen when you are in the same room as your partner. However, you can also engage in mutual masturbation while you are hundreds of miles apart. Toys are optional, but can definitely enhance the experience.

Couples can use mutual masturbation as foreplay or base their entire sexual session on it.   The choice is yours.

Hesitant? Getting Over Your First Time Jitters

Let’s face it. Anytime you try something new in the bedroom, it’s a bit nerve-wracking. This is no different. In fact, masturbating with a partner can be particularly awkward at first. After all, when you pleasure yourself, there’s nobody there but you. There’s no worrying about looking or sounding weird.

On top of that, many of us have some pretty strong hang-ups when it comes to this topic. Sad to say, but the idea that this as a dirty or sinful activity hasn’t completely gone away. If all of this feels a bit taboo, you aren’t alone. You’re also in good company if you’re worried about how you’ll look when you perform.

If you’re hesitant to give mutual masturbation a try, here are a few tips that could help you ease into things:

  • Talk to your partner! There is absolutely no substitute for an honest conversation about your thoughts and feelings on this, positive or negative.
  • Watch masturbation porn and not just professional stuff. Hit Pornhub, and tune into the amateur videos.  You’ll quickly find that everyone has a weird O-face, and it’s still incredibly sexy to watch someone orgasm.
  • Start slowly. There’s no rule that you and your partner have to start and finish the act in front of one another. Encourage your partner to touch themselves for just a few minutes before you go down on them or penetrate them. Give them a little bit of a show of your jerking off, before you get down to something else. Take your time getting comfortable with the idea.
  • Bring masturbation into your fantasy life. Talk to your lover about how you think about them while you masturbate. Encourage them to masturbate as well, whether you are there or not. Go shopping for toys together.

Mutual Masturbation: Here’s Why It’s So Amazing!

If you can get over the first time jitters, you can move onto the best part. That’s getting yourself off in front of your partner, and watching them do the same. It’s a great experience on both a physical and emotional level. Here are just some of the reasons why.

You’ll Learn so Much About Your Partner

This is sex-ed like you’ve never experienced before. If you’re experienced at masturbation, chances are you know exactly what you like and don’t like. In fact, you can probably get yourself off in just a few minutes, or make a jack off session last as long as you’d like. You also know what you don’t like. The more you masturbate, the more you work out your ideal speed, grip, friction, even position.

When your partner watches you play with yourself, they get the benefit of your years of self-pleasuring experience. This is your chance to show them exactly what you like, what gets you off, and what techniques help you to slow down and prolong things.

happy couple in bed

Of course, the opposite is true as well. Take advantage of this opportunity to see what your partner does to pleasure themselves when you’re away. You might be surprised at what you learn. There’s nothing quite like seeing your partner doing something to themselves that you’ve never considered before. You might also be a bit embarrassed to learn that one or two of your techniques isn’t really doing it for them.

If you feel up to it, get in close as they play with themselves. Watch what they do, and ask them to talk their way through it. Ask them to do the same when it’s your turn. Both of you can walk away from the experience having learned so much about the other’s preferences.

  • Don’t worry if one or both of you are a bit shy - there are some techniques to help with that.
  • Ask your partner to sit behind you. They can rub your shoulders and caress you from behind as you stroke your cock. You can do the same for them.
  • You can also try placing a chair at the end of the bed or across the room if one of you isn’t ready to be watched up close and personal.
  • Try throwing a blanket over both of you as you masturbate. Weirdly enough this can help with shyness, and add an erotic intensity to the experience.

It May Be The Safest Sex Of All!

Great sex is for everyone, even people in high-risk situations. Don’t let your status or your partner’s stop you and your lover from enjoying great sexual experiences with one another. When it comes to preventing pregnancy and lowering the risk of spreading an STI, there’s not much safer than mutual masturbation. In fact, it’s way safer than oral sex, touching, or penetration.

Of course, that doesn’t mean it’s 100% risk-free. You still may need to take some precautions. This might include using a condom to prevent any fluid transfer, taking care with post-play clean up, and being very careful with your sex toys.

If you want a super-relaxed cleanup, consider purchasing your own UVee HOME Play unit. In 10 minutes, you can clean and charge your sex toys simultaneously, and relax while you get ready for the next round of play. How about that?

It’s a Super Laid Back Way to Make Love to Your Partner

tattooed couple in bed

Let’s face it, you aren’t a teenager anymore. Stress, work, and other factors can make you and your partner both too tired for enthusiastic rounds of energetic sex. Still, that doesn’t mean you don’t want to enjoy one another and get off. Mutual masturbation is perfect for those moments.  Think about it.  Both of you snuggled up together on the couch or in bed, as each of you gets yourself off at your own speed.

There’s no pressure, just laid back affection and companionship. At the end of it, you can both doze off happier than when you started.

Here’s something else to consider. Nobody has it in them to be an attentive lover all of the time. That’s perfectly fine. With partnered masturbation, you take away the obligation to perform while still ensuring that everyone’s pleasure is a priority.

It’s a Great Option For Mismatched Sex Drives

In a perfect world, everyone would fall in love with someone whose sex drive matched theirs perfectly. Of course, in a perfect world, you’d either be born ripped or with an intense hatred of carbs. In reality, every couple hits patches where one of them is more in the mood than the other.

Sometimes, the answer is simply no. That’s okay! With mutual masturbation, the answer can also be, ‘I’m not really down for anything tonight. I’d love to watch you though!’

The hornier partner can then pleasure themselves, while the other:

  • Watches and enjoys
  • Provides dirty talk and encouragement
  • Plays erotic DJ with the perfect sexy music
  • Does a bit of live nude modeling for inspiration
  • Kisses and holds the masturbating partner to create a more erotic experience

Mismatched libidoes don’t have to be a cause of relationship frustrations!

It Really Helps Keep Long Distance Relationships Hot

Work, school, and expenses can keep couples apart for days, weeks, even months at a time. That can be absolute hell on your sex life. Phone sex really can help keep things hot. To keep things really amazing, try adding in mutual masturbation.

couple on phone

It’s easy to do, thanks to a myriad of video chat options available to you. Even better, it can feel a bit rebellious, and that’s a real turn-on.

This also lends itself really well to roleplaying. Ask your partner to instruct you as you perform, then you can do the same. Add costumes, if you’re into that sort of things. There’s also a great opportunity for using toys here!

You Can Level up Your Use of Toys

Just like you and your lover can use mutual masturbation to learn more about the other’s preferences, you can also get a major education about using toys. You know that bullet vibrator your partner keeps in her drawer for when you’re away? Now it’s time to learn exactly how she likes to use it.

You can do the same! If you’ve got a fleshlight, masturbator, or even a dildo, bring it out! Chances are, your partner is curious about that as well. They may even find the idea that you use toys to be a major turn-on.

If you don’t mind investing a bit of money, and love technology, you might consider purchasing a smart, sex toy. If you think mutual masturbation via Skype is hot, imagine controlling your partner’s vibrator with your smartphone! If you’re into it, they also have dildos and prostate massagers that give your partner the same control.

It Can Enhance Your Connection With Your Partner

Masturbating in front of someone is a bit like sharing a secret. You’re letting them see something you normally do in private. They’re giving you the same, intimate access as well. Yes, the first time can be absolutely nerve-wracking. Still, if you can get past it, you and your partner will probably come out the other side feeling more connected than ever. This can help your sex life and relationship in so many ways.

happy lesbian couple

Techniques For Making Mutual Masturbation Hot

We touched on a few techniques above. Now, let’s really dig in, and talk about how you and your partner can get the most out of jacking off in front of each other.

Try Drawing Things Out

Masturbation is a great tool when it comes to teaching yourself how to delay orgasm. This is something that you and your partner can practice together in your next mutual masturbation session.

Try this:

  • Have your partner get as comfortable as possible, then start touching themselves. They should bring themselves as close to orgasm as possible without getting there and then stop.
  • Next, it’s your turn. Stop just before you come, and then have them start again.
  • See who can last the longest until they absolutely must orgasm.

If you’re feeling competitive, feel free to say and do things that you know will drive your partner wild. Move in right up next to them, remind them of dirty adventures you’ve had in the past,  whisper about going down on them or climbing on top of them, or maybe sneak in for a few teasing rubs or strokes yourself. This is one game where losing isn’t so bad at all.

Try this rule to make things exciting. Whoever finishes first has to use their mouth or hands to bring the ‘winner’ to climax.

Use Different Positions

Are one or both of you a bit shy? Sit, back to back on your bed or on the floor. Pleasure yourselves, and use the sensations of your bodies touching to feel when your partner gets close to climaxing. As you get yourselves off, talk to each other about the sensations you’re feeling, or just enjoy the blissful silence.

woman lying on bed

If you want an intensely intimate experience, lay on your sides facing each other. Encourage your partner to place their leg over yours. Each of you can use one hand to masturbate, and the other to caress the other.

Try letting your partner focus completely on herself.

  • Sit on the bed or floor with your legs spread.
  • Hold her against you so her back is against your chest.
  • Kiss and suck on her neck and shoulders, caress her breasts and talk dirty to her.
  • As you’re doing all of these things, she can use her fingers or a vibrator to get herself off.

Next, switch places so she can do the same for you.

Go as Fast And as Hard as You do Solo

Do you know that super intense, slightly rough jacking off that you do when you just want to get off as quickly and intensely as possible? That’s so hot. Try a no holds barred masturbation session with your partner where both of you masturbate in front of the other with no other goal than getting off.

Have a discussion about where you’ll finish. It can really take your experience over the top if you can finish on your partner’s bare ass, chest, or tummy.

Use One Another as Sex Toys

Lube up, then place your partner's hand around your cock. Move their hand around until their grip is just like you like it. Now, close your hand around theirs to get a perfect pressure. Keep their hand and arm firmly in place, and start thrusting. The idea isn’t to get a handjob, it’s to get yourself off as you have sex with your partner’s hand while it encircles your dick. You get the sensation of your partner’s hand on your cock. Your partner can hold you and talk dirty to you while you bring yourself closer and closer to climax.

intimate couple


Next, you can do the same for her. Have her stand up and place your hand between her legs. She can either have you penetrate her or press your hand against her clitoris. Once your hand is in the perfect spot, she can grind or gyrate against it until she comes. In the meantime, use your spare hand to hold her tight against your body, or to caress her breasts and ass.

Give Pleasure While You Pleasure Yourself

Okay, these techniques may not fall under the strictest definition of mutual masturbation, but we think they’re close enough. Here, you pleasure yourself while also getting your partner off. This could mean:

  • Having your partner ride your face as you stroke yourself to climax.
  • Penetrate your partner anally as they use a sex toy to orgasm.
  • Take a good pegging yourself as you jerk off or use a male masturbator. There are strap-ons that provide clitoral stimulation to your partner as they penetrate you.
  • Control a smart vibrator you’ve inserted into your partner as she gives you oral.

Use Roleplay And Kink to Keep Things Interesting

Even mutual masturbation can become boring if you and your partner do the same things over and over again. With roleplaying, you can create new scenarios that make this interesting each time you do it.

Here are a few scenarios:

  • Getting Caught - Have your partner relax in bed with their toys, videos, etc. Come in later, and catch them in the act.
  • In Trouble With Teacher - Play the role of a student who gets caught masturbating to a dirty magazine when they should be studying.
  • Fun With Phones - Try some video inception. Record yourself jerking off for your partner. Have them watch the video, and record themselves as they masturbate. They can pass their video to you so you can continue the chain.
  • Dress Up - Bring some costumes into the mix. Your partner may find the sight of you jacking off to be intensely arousing. Add a sexy outfit, and that could multiply.
  • Be Kinky - Try some light BDSM. Use cuffs or soft rope to bind your partner to the bed. Then, kneel or stand over them as you jerk yourself off. Use a strap or your hand to spank your partner as they pleasure themselves with their fingers or a vibrator. Two reminders though! Play safe, and always be willing to reciprocate and let your partner take on the dominant role.

Go Shopping For Some Toys Together

Sex toys really can enhance this experience. You can use toys to pleasure yourselves, and one another. A good sex toy can really add a new intensity to your masturbation sessions that gives both of you something even more exciting to watch. Take a trip to your local sex shop to see what turns both of you on. If you’d rather shop from the comfort of your own home, you have plenty of online shopping options.

As you pick something out, don’t just think of the pleasure it will bring. Talk about how and why you want to use the toy and what ideas it gives you. Remember that the aesthetics of your choice are important as well. How will that toy look doing naughty things to your partner?  Will it look sexy doing naught things to you?


Keep Communicating With Each Other

Any time you introduce something new to your sex life, communication is the key to success. This is no different. Talk about your fantasies, expectations, and anxieties before you dive in. After you’ve tried mutual masturbation, connect with your partner afterward to see how things went. Ask them what turned them on, or if there’s anything they’d rather not do again. Be honest about your own feelings as well. Then, keep fine-tuning your approach until both of you look forward to more sessions masturbating together.